Ploughmans CC vs Islands Vale CC (Home) 9th August 2020

Match Report

Wow: Islands Vale Chow Down on Plough as PCC Kowtow

In what was one of the hottest days of the year, a dusty Hollies became the dry, baron wasteland where Plough’s Gold soldiers went to perish on Sunday.

It did not start well for the Plough, with Islands Vale CC winning the toss and electing to tell us whether they would bat or bowl when their captain arrived, despite the toss taking place 45 minutes after the scheduled start time. Eventually Plough CC were sent into bowl.

The game saw the long-awaited return of South-African born entrepreneur DJ Pistorius and it didn’t take long for the people in neighbouring Brixton to become re-acquainted with the all-rounder’s characteristic dulcet tones travelling into their windows across the winds from the DSG.

Opening the bowling was Matt Hopper and Yasir Hussain who both bowled well in the face of some not so circumspect opening batting. Hopper eventually broke the opening partnership with a ball that climbed on the batsman who was caught by Pistorius in the gully. Pistorius exclaimed to the lads after the grab that it was his 100th catch for the Plough which he had rounded up from that actual number (50) as confirmed by club statistician James Tisato after the game.

Coming on first change was Mark Wildig who bowled well and took a couple of scalps and kept Plough in the contest in the middle overs. The other end saw the first contribution by Pistorius and it didn’t take long for him to find his zone – about 45 metres over the rope, as his first two balls were dispatched for six. I think he was bowling leg spin but he didn’t land any so it was hard to tell. Some things never change … but the bowling from Duray’s end did end and on came Niraj “the West Drayton Globe Trotter” Tailor (“NWDGTT”).

NWDGTT bowled extremely well in a spell where the wiry off-spinner always looked on top. He hardly bowled a bad ball and dominated the batsmen like Labour candidate Janet Duncan dominated the West Drayton 2018 election. It was as one-sided an affair we have seen since West Drayton Explorers FC beat Sipson Way and Old Draytonians 10-nil in the West Drayton Community Shield in 1986. He ended up with 4 wickets off his 6 overs and an economy as good a value as the council tax in West Drayton.

After the game, Pistorius told waiting journalists that “it was definitely an off-spinners wicket, not much in it for leg-spin today, off-spin only from that end.”

Some good death bowling from skipper Grant Wolledge and Mohammed Khan limited the damage and Islands Vale CC finished on 9 for 235 off their 35 overs. It was fair to say the Plough had work to do in reply.

Iskander Eaton and Alex Hickson opened the batting and managed to quell a fiery opening spell of bowling for about 7 balls before Iskander was dismissed for the first of what I am sure will be many globes for the Plough. Incoming batsmen Suri Poleboina came to the crease and after seeing a few half volleys whizz past the ears the batsmen decided to attack and put on 30 odd quick runs before Hickson was dismissed for 20 caught behind for the second week in a row, off the glove. Grant Wolledge and Suri briefly steadied the ship before Suri was bowled bringing DJ Pistorius to the crease. Call the plumber because the pipes were looking hot and swole as Pistorius arrived at the crease sans sleeves in his Plough singlet, much to the dismay of the Islands Vale CC. Cancel the plumber because it wasn’t long until the pipes were back in the shade, cooling on the side-line with Pistorius and his singlet dismissed for the second duck of the innings by a ball that kept lower than the crime rate in West Drayton.

After the game Pistorius told the West Drayton Times “it was definitely not a batting wicket, not much in it for the batsmen today… or leg-spinners, only an off-spinner’s wicket really, very odd”.

Duray’s dismissal brought Paddy Gledhill to the crease and along with Wolledge the two batsmen negotiated a very tricky wicket and fought extremely hard to take the Plough to a respectable total. The pair were the pick of the batsmen on the day, with Wolledge smoking a few cover drives and Paddy showing the Plough lads how to protect your wicket and hit the bad ball on a pitch where runs weren’t easy to come by. They put on a 50 run partnership and the rest of the Plough batsmen pitched in to finish on 7 for 148 off 35 overs with Gledhill unbeaten on 21. The Plough fell 87 runs short.

Who’s Hot: Duray’s arms

Who’s Not: The pitch

Who’s Shot: Wolledge’s cover drive

Who’s Pot: Yanni’s

Author: Anon (aka OG Hicko)

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